‘Stingy Men’ take on Nigeria’s dating etiquette

Women of Nigeria watch out – the men are in revolt.

No longer will they pay for lavish dates; no longer will they provide expensive gifts; no longer will they hand over cash on demand.

That is, at least, according to the country’s Stingy Men Association.

It is a fictional creation – a light-hearted response on social media that emerged earlier this year to some male concerns about the cost of dating.

“It’s tough being a man in Nigeria, there is too much pressure on us,” 35-year-old Lagos-based journalist Fred Itua told the BBC.

“Everyone expects so much from you. Men should not be seen as spending machines, we also want to be pampered.”
 
Another man echoed this, saying on Facebook that he felt he did not get the recognition he deserved for the cash he had spent on dates: “Most generous guys are seen as objects to be manipulated, used and disrespected for their generosity.”

The buzz the Stingy Men Association generated on social media gave way to an app, which allowed those that downloaded it to design their own ID cards. It got more than 50,000 downloads within days.

“Members” were also expected to swear an oath to give “shishi” (Nigerian slang for “nothing”) to women.

But some women were sceptical that men could stick to their guns – a view summarised in a tweet showing a photo of actress in a minidress accompanied by the words: “I dressed like this to his house and he denounced his membership of the Stingy Men Association.”