If you endured bullying throughout your childhood, how would you feel if one of your close family members began a relationship with your bully and ended up planning to marry them?
That’s exactly what happened to one man on Reddit, who has been left furious after his own twin started dating his school bully two years ago – and recently got engaged to him.
In his post, the 28-year-old man said he was “bullied relentlessly” throughout secondary school by the man he named Terry, and his actions even forced him to skip large parts of his schooling between Year 9 and Year 10 so that he could avoid his “verbal abuse”.
The man insisted he was “hurt” when his twin sister began dating Terry and only “tolerated” being around him for the sake of his sibling’s happiness – but he refuses to attend their wedding.
He said: “I’ll keep this as short as I can my twin sister recently got engaged to a guy who I’ll call Terry.
“In secondary school, Terry was a year above us and he and his friends bullied me relentlessly. I’ll spare you the finer details, but I’m talking ’caused me lifelong psychological issues’ type of s**t.
It was never physical, but it was a literal daily onslaught of psychological and verbal abuse, to the point where I bunked off probably half of Years 9 and 10 just so I could avoid it.
“I’m not a hateful or spiteful person, but I absolutely despise Terry for how he treated me when we were kids.
I was hurt when my sister started dating him two years ago, but I tolerate being around him when I absolutely have to for the sake of keeping the peace.
“However, I will not be attending their wedding or having anything at all to do with it. Why would I want to go to an event which is effectively celebrating the guy who absolutely lavished in tormenting me for almost six years of my life?”
The man’s decision to not attend his sister’s wedding has not gone down well with his family, and his sister has even accused him of being “selfish and petty” for not accepting that people can change.
But the man claims Terry has made no attempt to apologise or show any remorse for his past.
He added: “My sister is not happy about this. She says I’m being a selfish and petty a***hole who won’t accept that people can change, although Terry has shown no indication of remorse for his behaviour and has even tried to bring some things he did up like they were fun little jokes I was in on.
“Our dad is on my sister’s side and has been giving me a really hard time about it, though our grandparents are a little more sympathetic to me.”
Commenters on the Reddit post were largely on the man’s side, with many of them stating he doesn’t have an obligation to attend his sister’s wedding if it makes him uncomfortable.
One person said: “I’d make it not only clear it wasn’t a joke, but it also had consequences. Also, you won’t object to their wedding, but will in no way interact with him. It’s your right to do so.
“Your sister is being tone-deaf and has rose coloured glasses if she’s ignoring what you went through.”
As another added: “Bullying is no joke, and the fact that Terry still treats it like that shows no self-reflection on his part. You can’t really be expected to forgive someone who wronged you if they aren’t even remorseful.”