In the age of online dating, having a profile on a dating app while you’re in a relationship isn’t automatically a sign of anything malicious – especially if the account has been unused for a while.
But what if you had an active dating profile that was in use just one month before you were due to get married?
That’s what one man on Reddit has seemingly found after he accidentally stumbled across a Bumble profile for one of his best friends, who is set to tie the knot in May, just over one month away.
In his post, the man explained he was told about the profile by another friend before going to check it out himself, and when he confronted the 31-year-old woman about her account, she lied to him about its origins.
He said: “A close friend of mine for years is engaged to a guy who I really like and is getting married in May.
“Yesterday, a friend of mine found her on Bumble and texted me screenshots. I sent them to her asking if there is something I should know, and she replied that they must be from when she was still single and that she probably forgot to turn it off.
“Thing is, I recognise the pictures and they’re recent. My girlfriend and I are even in one of them. I had spoken to her fiancé earlier that day about bachelor party plans and everything sounded like it was very much still on.”
The man now wonders if his friend is “having second thoughts” about the marriage, and is unsure of whether or not to approach her fiancé with the dating app evidence.
He added: “Some of our friends have joked that she can do better – she’s really, really attractive and makes great money, while he’s very much the blue-collar type.
But he treats her like a princess, a big upgrade from the boys she’s dated in the past. I get the feeling she’s having second thoughts and looking around again.
“I’m kind of conflicted on whether or not I should bring this up, and if I do, whether I should talk to her or him about it.
She’s a close friend and if things don’t work out, it’s her side that I’ll take. But I’ve been in toxic relationships before and can’t help but think I’d feel very guilty if he marries her next month without knowing she’s not fully invested.”
Commenters on the Reddit post suggested the man tell his friend’s partner what he found, as while it might hurt the groom-to-be in the short-term, he’ll appreciate being told.
One person said: “I know plenty of people might say stay out of it and I understand that to some degree, but all I can think is that if I were that guy I would hope someone would tell me that information before I got married to a person like her.”
While another added: “He deserves to be able to make an informed choice. Show him the same compassion and respect that you’d want to be shown.”