Dear Coleen
My boyfriend has a really good female best friend who he’s known since they were kids.
They grew up next door to each other and their parents are friends. I don’t have a problem with her – we’ve met quite a few times and she seems like a nice person.
Thing is, she’s invited my boyfriend on a weekend glamping trip and is bringing one of her female friends. The idea is they’ll share a yurt and I’m not happy about it.
I don’t want to be a needy, jealous girlfriend, but I checked out this friend on social media and she’s very hot.
Am I being unreasonable to feel this weekend away is inappropriate? I’m pretty sure he’d be raging if I decided to spend a weekend in a tent with two guys.
The truth is, I feel angry and hurt that he’d rather spend a weekend with them than with me. I’d appreciate your opinion.
Coleen says
I don’t think you’re being unreasonable. His mate bringing a friend moves the goalposts a bit, so why can’t he invite you along too?
You have to be honest that you’re not happy about it and ask him if he’d be OK with you spending a weekend in a tent with two guys. If he says yes, I think he’s lying!
You can’t stop him from going, but ask him to think about what’s more important– this weekend or your relationship.
If you trusted him 100%, I don’t think you’d be having these feelings, so that’s worth thinking about that too.
Has he given you a reason in the past not to trust him or is it down to insecurity on your part?
It’s a tussle between clipping someone’s wings or letting them fly and seeing what happens.
If he messes up, then at least you know where you stand.