Dear Coleen,
I found my 15-year-old son watching porn the other night and didn’t handle the situation too well.
I basically screamed at him and he screamed back at me to get out. Things have been really awkward since.
I’m really anti-porn and especially worried about teenagers watching it, as I think it will give them a very skewed view of sex.
I want my son to grow up respecting women and being able to form healthy, loving relationships, so seeing him watching porn has really freaked me out.
Do you have any advice on how I can talk to him?
Coleen says
Well, start by talking to him instead of screaming at him. He’s no different to the majority of teenage boys – his hormones are raging and he’s thinking about sex a lot of the time.
The difference these days is that porn is so accessible via the internet and it’s very easy for it to become addictive.
We all know porn is an unrealistic view of sex, but I think you can talk to your son about that, and also talk to him about respect for women.
You can explain what your worries are around pornography and even show him some research.
He probably feels very embarrassed and awkward, so take the higher ground here and have a discussion with him without making him feel that he’s done something really bad.