Friendship is a beautiful thing. We lean on each other, we lift each other up, we share secrets, we take opinions – our friends are our chosen family. Most friend circles are made up of different kinds of personalities. Observe your own – there’s the funny one, the cry baby, the mature one, the party animal, the home bird and so on. However, while that might vary from group to group, there’s one kind of friend that everyone has – the strongone!
The strong friend in a clique is the one who always has your back. She’s the one who gives you all the pep talk, the one who isn’t afraid to stand up for her friends, the one who always appears to have it all sorted out. She’s the go-to girl who some like to call the ‘agony aunt’, or even the ‘motherly’ one. If you don’t know that person, chances are you are that person
However, contrary to popular belief, the ‘strong’ pal you have doesn’t always have it all together. As a popular Linkin Park lyric goes, “I’m strong on the surface, not all the way through…”. Just because someone is able to conceal their vulnerability, hold their tears, and offer endless advice or support to others, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t need anyone to lean on herself. Though most of us don’t realize it, we tend to take our dependable friend for granted. We’re so caught up with sharing our problems and worries with them that we forget to check if they’re doing alright. And anyway they’d prefer to sweep that under the carpet and attend to your issues.
So today, to all those with a strong friend – check on them! Don’t be careless and assume that just because they do not reveal their emotional side much, they don’t have one. Quit assuming that there isn’t a need to ask them how their life is going simply because they don’t find it necessary to overshare. Understand that while you may cope with your problems by blurting everything out to them, that’s not how they function. Nevertheless, they need your attention too. Don’t forget that your strong friend could always use a friend that cares for them too.
And of course, to all those ‘strong ones’ who are reading this – it’s more than alright to acknowledge sadness and vulnerability sometimes. It’s human. Give your friends the opportunity to come to your rescue, the same way you come forth to help them. The truth is, you can be strong and weak at the same time. There’s beauty in our brokenness and raw emotions. Allow your closest friends to see the real you – the sleepy you, the insecure you, the depressed you, the lonely you – and trust them to love you anyway.