There are definitely a few conversations not to have with your partner, not only for the sake of their mental health but also for the stability of your relationship.
It’s smart to talk about everything at least once — especially if it’s something that’s bothering you — since doing so can mean building a solid relationship.
While it’s always a good idea to be open and honest with your significant other — all in the name of creating a trusting, supportive, and solid relationship — there are definitely a few conversations not to have with your partner, not only for the sake of their mental health but also for the stability of your relationship.
Depending on the topic, there can be a limit to exactly what you say, and how often you say it if you notice it’s having a negative impact on your relationship.
Avoid these conversations until you are very secure together and you know that it will not make a dent in your relationship.
- Your dislike for his family
Would you yourself like it if he criticizes your family? Even if you know that some of the folks in your family are annoying, will you be able to digest him picking on them? If you are facing some issues then let him know that but do not criticise or tell him that you do not like ABC. These boundaries are very important in a relationship.
- Past sexual encounters
Just like you should avoid a conversation about your ex, refrain from telling him about your past sex life even if it was much better than what he is able to provide. They will keep comparing themselves to your partner and the insecurities just grow.
- Shortcomings
Be honest but don’t just flow like a river when it comes to his shortcomings. Do not criticise him all the time. Doi let him know that something is bothering you but do not point it out on a regular basis.
- Money issues
Discuss finances, create joint budgets but do not make money an issue between the two of you. Many people can have different reasons to defend themselves when it comes to money. Some even have traumas attached to money especially if they have seen poverty while growing up. Even the rich can have issues if the parents tried to buy their happiness more with money rather than spending time with them. Money can trigger memories you cannot fathom at times. So try to not talk only about money and sense the direction of the conversation when you do. Change the topic if you have to.
- How your friends and family judge your relationship
Everyone’s friend or family member judges their relationship. It is inevitable. You cannot change some attitudes but what you can do is save your partner from that judgment. How? Quit telling him what others think. If they do ask, say it in a positive light even if it was otherwise. You do not have to get into the details. Also, do remember that you cannot please everyone so it is okay even if people judge your relationship in a negative way.