Question: Hi! I am a 32-year-old man and I live with my parents. I have a 28-year-old younger sister who lives in a separate city. We have been persuading her to get married for the last two years but she tries to avoid the topic.
We even asked her that if she is in love with anyone, we are even ready to meet him. For us, her happiness matters the most. She says there is no one in her life and she disconnects the phone when we try to talk about her marriage. I have a girlfriend who is also in her late twenties and her parents are looking for a match for her. They want her to get married this year itself and they have no problem with me. But my parents are adamant that I cannot marry unless my sister gets married. And my sister does not want to get married. She never tells us the reason why she does not want to tie the knot. How do we convince her to get married? Please help me. —By Anonymous
Response by Dr. Rachna Khanna Singh: Hi! Thanks for reaching out. I can understand that it must be difficult to not marry your girlfriend due to your family. It also sounds like you want what is best for your sister but there is a bit of a communication gap between her and your family.
To approach this, you should talk to your sister in an open and non-judgemental manner and understand her perspective. Quite often, women face a lot of pressure to get married and it is difficult for them to express the strain they are feeling when their family members do not understand where they are coming from. Try and explain that you want her to be happy but you are also facing pressure from your parents since you want to marry your girlfriend but cannot. You should focus your energy on convincing your parents rather than your sister. Although it is easier said than done, try and make your parents see that you are both coming from very different headspaces and one sibling’s personal life should not dictate the other’s future. Hope this helps. Stay home and stay safe