It sounds cliche, but sometimes you meet someone and get the vibe that you’re better off as “just friends” rather than lovers. Despite that crappy feeling you have in your stomach, it’s totally okay to not be into it romantically.
Don’t worry, you’re not a bad person. It just means that you know yourself well enough to recognize good energy, conversations that flow easily, and what you want in a person.
Then the anxiety sets in. It’s time to figure out how to reject them. The thought of ghosting them crosses your mind. Others have done it to you, so why not?. But you could never morally do that. So what do you do? Well, I have some helpful tips and tricks to use.
First things first, you have to hit the right balance in your rejection text. You want to be direct so there’s no room for confusion, but you also want to be civil enough to leave room for potential friendship if that’s what you’re looking for from them. Oh, and you want to be nice about it.
I’ve broken down some categories to cover all situations (unless it was a disastrous date — then go off, sis).
Straight to the point while still being nice:
Please note, if you’re looking to soften the blow or potentially gain a friendship from this person, emphasize that you had a great time!
- Hey, I had a lot of fun last night. However, I don’t think we have romantic chemistry. But I would like to be friends.
- Hey, I just wanted to follow up after our date. I’m sorry, but I didn’t feel as much of a romantic connection as I thought, but would love to stay friends.
- While we were on our date, I got the sense that we may not work romantically, but may be better off as friends.
- I’m more interested in becoming friends.
- I’m going to be honest, I just didn’t feel the romantic spark on our date last night. Truthfully, I felt more of a friendship forming and would like to continue that route if you want.
- Last night was fun, but I’m not romantically interested in you. But I do still want to be friends with you.
- I’m really flattered you had such a good time last night, but I’m not currently interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with you.
Rejection texts that provide a bit more of an explanation:
- Hey, I’ve been thinking about our date and I think it’s best if we stay friends. I… (insert reason)
- As much as I enjoyed our date, I felt more of a friendship vibe with you for (reason). Did you want to keep hanging out as friends?
- Thank you for following up on our date. I had a lot of fun too, but I’m not interested in continuing a romantic relationship with you because (reason). I hope you understand. But I would still like to be friends.
- I had so much fun on our date, but because (reason), I think we should try hanging out as friends next time. I hope you understand.
The super sweet rejection text attempt:
- I think you’re (compliment) and I like (compliments). That being said, I just didn’t feel any romantic chemistry between us and think we may be better off as friends. Is that something you’re open to?
- I loved bonding with you over (subject), but I felt more of a friendship connection with you rather than a romantic one.
- It’s really refreshing to find someone who also likes (subject). To be honest, I didn’t get the romantic spark I was hoping for, but I think we could still become really good friends. Did you want to do (activity) sometime?
- It’s clear from our date that you’re a (compliment) and I really admire that about you. But I sadly wasn’t feeling the romantic vibe as much as I was hoping to. I hope you understand.
- Even though I didn’t feel the romantic connection I thought I would between us, I loved (compliment) about you and would still be interested in hanging out again as friends.
It’s important to remember that you can always provide a further explanation or change these to best fit your situation. This is just a guideline on how to pull off the bandaid, so to speak. You don’t have to be nice if you don’t want to, but morally you may want to take that route.